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STOP LIVING LIKE A BACKGROUND EXTRA

by Joey Freddy Larsen
Dec 09, 2025

A questionable IHOP meal, a spiritual smackdown, and why your next lead role is already yours.

🧠 TL;DR THIS WEEK IN LEAD ACTOR WEEKLY:


• My accidental awakening over chicken fajitas

• What Business By Design Live actually is (and why walking in felt like entering Hogwarts for entrepreneurs)

• The question that punched me in the soul in the best way

• Why “future you” might be the one holding you back

• The industry shifts nobody wants to talk about

• Free tools that actually help

• Monologue of the Month Club vibes

• Thursday rehearsal invite

• AAC booking notes

 

🎭 FEATURE STORY
THE MOMENT YOU FINALLY STEP INTO THE LEAD ROLE OF YOUR LIFE

Hey there! How’s it going?

I’m packing for Phoenix this week because I’m heading back to Business By Design Live. If you’ve never heard of it, imagine a giant room full of entrepreneurs, creatives, and coaches all building business that aligns with your lifestyle. It’s business strategy meets spiritual awakening meets summer camp for adults.

The first time I went in 2023, I walked in not knowing anyone. Full “fly on the wall” background extra energy. Which is hilarious, because on stage and screen I’ve played lead roles and coached hundreds of actors to book their own lead roles.

Yet in real life? I was showing up like a character named “Guy In Background Who Walks By With Coffee.” And here’s the wild part: I didn’t even realize I was doing it.

Actors do this constantly. You don’t consciously decide to shrink. You just quietly slip into the role of “background energy” without noticing.

I was deep in that pattern the night I found myself at an IHOP. If you’ve never had a spiritual crisis at a 24-hour pancake place, I highly recommend the experience. It’s humbling. The lighting is unforgiving. And the universe loves to deliver messages in the least glamorous locations.

I was deciding whether to join a high-level coaching program with an $12K/year investment. My heart said yes, but my bank account screamed “absolutely not” in eight different languages.

At the time, I was thirty thousand dollars in debt, juggling credit cards like a magician who definitely should not have a show. And then, between bites of my IHOP chicken fajitas, I had this thought:

If this was a movie… who would I choose to BE right now? Not in five years. Not when I “figure things out.” Right now.

So I borrowed a pen from my waitress (shoutout to divine messengers named Irene) and filled out the application form. Just to feel the energy of choosing myself.

And something shifted. It felt like the universe whispering, “Finally, you've arrived”. The next morning I submitted the application and went to pay the $500 deposit.

But my card declined. Tried again. Declined. And yeah, I did that fake thing we all do when we are embarassed after a decline..."Oh! That's weird? It worked fine at the last place???". Anyone? Just me?

The universe said “yes,” but my credit limit said “nope” and that’s how my spiritual journey began. Eventually I figured it out and found a way to get the money and the payments went through, but that experience tested my resolve and my commitment to a better future.

Less than a year later, I had paid down that 30K in credit card debt and I'm still a member of that high level coaching mastermind.

But the real shift wasn’t financial. It was identity. I stopped waiting for some mythical future version of myself to swoop in and take the lead.

I finally stepped up in to the lead role of my own life. And here’s the truth I wish someone had told me YEARS ago:

You already belong in the rooms you’re dreaming about. You just haven’t let yourself believe it yet.

This matters even more now. AI is reshaping the industry. Auditions are tightening up. Self tapes are more competitive.

But the good news is live performance is making a comeback because it’s the one thing technology cannot fake. 

This is not the season to play small. This is the season to choose your lead role on purpose. Trust me, the universe didn’t bring you this far just to have you play “Reporter #2” in your own life.

So go make the movie of your life. Make it messy. Make it real. Make it now.

And please remember, YOU ARE THE LEAD ROLE OF YOUR OWN LIFE!

 

🎤 MONOLOGUE OF THE MONTH CLUB

Let’s talk craft for a second. Because if the industry is getting louder, faster, and more chaotic, the one thing that cuts through all the noise is presence.

And monologues are the ultimate presence gym. They sharpen your storytelling. They deepen your emotional vocabulary. They give you material for reels, self tapes, and casting submissions. They make you stand out in a sea of sameness.

And monologues build the one thing AI can’t touch: your lived, human truth. Inside the Monologue of the Month Club, we keep it simple:

1) Choose a powerful piece that is "Made for You".

2) Apply script analysis and storytelling techniques.

3) Rehearse with live coaching and feedback

4) Record and share to the world! (agents, casting directors, and social media)

You will get get stronger every month and over time you'll build an archive of powerful monologues showcasing you in lead role energy.

If 2026 is the year you want bigger roles…Monologue of the Month Club is your training ground. Join that at www.monologueclub.com for just $37.

 

🎁 FREE TOOLS FOR ACTORS


Here’s what each one actually does. No fluff.

• Audition Success Checklist
For when your brain goes into “did I forget something?” chaos mode.
Download it HERE

• Audition Success Tracker
It’s shocking how much faster you grow when you document it. 

Grab it HERE

• Agent Partnership Q&A Replay
Strengthen your relationship with your agent (or find new representation that aligns with you.) Watch it NOW

• Audition Affirmations Audio
Your nervous system deserves a pep talk too. Banish doubt and boost focus. Listen HERE

 

🎥 THURSDAY REHEARSAL ZOOM (8pm ET)

Every week our members hop on Zoom and actually do the thing. No overthinking.  No perfection chasing. Just rehearsal, adjustments, breakthroughs, and the occasional existential acting crisis solved in real time. 

When: Thursday Dec 11th 8pm ET.

Bring whatever you’re working on. A monologue. A scene. It’s all welcome. 

Not a member yet? Join us HERE

 

🎬 ACTORS AUDITION CLUB (Book Your Next Tape)

If you’ve got an audition coming up, don’t MacGyver it together with a desk lamp, a shaky reader, and hope. Get the real setup. A strong reader. Direction. Clean lighting and sound. A legit edit. And a performance that looks like you belong in the room.

Book your coached self tape with AAC (In Studio or Virtual)

- Joey Freddy Larsen

PS:

Every time I’ve waited for “future Joey” to step in and take over, he’s been late, confused, and usually eating snacks. Meanwhile the universe is like, “My dude… I already sent you the hint, the nudge, the sign, AND the coincidence. What are you waiting for?”

So if anything in this email poked at you, follow it. One small step. One decision. Leads move fast. Background extras wait. You already know which one you are, so choose (and act) wisely

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